


srsly just block this

by sadmax



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, Gay, Gen, Group Chat Fic, Group chat, M/M, idk how to tag this so, too much gay
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-27
Updated: 2017-04-17
Packaged: 2018-09-12 15:02:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 3,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9077878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadmax/pseuds/sadmax
Summary: Bi-utiful: he deserved to be screamed at,,, he had a mullet…Spacedad: thats not reason to get screamed at in your first day of class. [DISCONTINUED]





	1. lance hates mullets

**Author's Note:**

> ahhh so yeah, this is shit. its 05:51 am and i should be writing other things but here i am  
> kms

**_Gay memes;_ **

**_Bi-utiful >> spacedad, smolbuttough, walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, coolspaceuncle_ **

**Bi-utiful:** oH MY GOD

**Bi-utiful:** i just came from my last class and,,

**Bi-utiful:** the new guy was so rude and annoyin’???? like wtf

**Smolbuttough:** new guy?

**Walkingsunshine:** yeah, there’s a new student in our class

**Walkingsunshine:** lance and him had a rough start so now lance “hates” him

**Bi-utiful:** I don’t “hate” him

**Bi-utiful:** i HATE HIM.

**Smolbuttough:** lmao

**Smolbuttough:** what did he do that u hate him so much

**Bi-utiful:** he sat in my spot and i told him to go away cause thats my place and he told me that i should go away cuz he was there first and then he ignored me while i was tryin to talk to him

**Walkingsunshine:** u were almost screamin at the por guy

**Bi-utiful:** and the he throw me a notebook!!

**Smolbuttough:** hA u deserve it

**Bi-utiful:** and then he answered almost all the questions the teacher made ???? ugh so annoyin

**Smolbuttough:** just beacuse he’s smart?

**Smolbuttough:** dont worry lance, u dont look as idiot as u r

**Bi-utiful:** hey!

**Bi-utiful:** he deserved to be screamed at,,, he had a mullet…

**Spacedad:** thats not reason to get screamed at in your first day of class.

**Smolbuttough:** yo, talkin’ abt first day of class

**Smolbuttough:** wasnt ur lil bro coming to live w u ?

**Spacedad:** Yeh

**Spacedad:** oh, he just got from his clases

**Walkingsunshine:** add him to the gc!

**Bi-utiful:** yeah, lets see if he is cool

**Bi-utiful:** and single ;)))

**Smolbuttough:** gross

**Spacedad:** lance…

**Bi-utiful:** okay okay sorry i wont flirt w him

**Spacedad:** … you screamed at my baby bro’s face in his first day in a new college…

**Smolbuttough** : OH SHIT, IT WAS SHIRO’S BROTHER

**Walkingsunshine:** rip in peace lance

**Bi-utiful:** NO FUCKIN WAY

**_Spaceprincess added Keith kogay to the chat_ **

**Bi-utiful:** oh so u never talk and when u do is to betray me?

**Spaceprincess:** ;) <3

**Keith kogay:** uhm??? Whats this?

**Walkingsunshine:** hi Keith! Its me Hunk, we have the last class together :)

**Keith kogay:** oh, hi Hunk

**Bi-utiful:** shiro,,, dont kill me

**Spacedad:** lance, apologize

**Keithkogay:**???

**Smolbuttough:** hahaha, thats the guy that screamed at u in class

**Keith kogay:** omg

**Keith kogay:** u r that fucker??

**Spacedad:** Keith… language

**Bi-utiful:** me?? Fucker? I wasnt the one who sat in someone’s else place and then throw a book at them!!

**Keith kogay:** uhm excuse u but u were screamin at my face thank u

**Bi-utiful:** fuck u! i sat there since the first day of class

**Keith kogay:** sounds fake but okay

**Smolbuttough:** omg he memes

**Spaceprincess:** yasss one more in the meme hell

**Spacedad:** oh god no

**Walkingsunshine:** sigh why

**Keith kogay:** memes r what keeps me alive

**Keith kogay:** after aliens and mothman ofc

**Smolbuttough:** i just found my best friend for life

**Smolbuttough:** aliens all the way

**Keith kogay:** aliens all the way

**Bi-utiful:** uhg, another alien weirdo

**Spacedad:** lance, thats rude

**Keith kogay:** lol

**Bi-utiful:** dont lol me mullet boy

**Keith kogay:** L O L

**Bi-utiful:** Ughh

**Walkingsunshine:** hes actually screaming in his pillow

**Spaceprincess:** lance u r a dramaqueen

**Bi-utiful:** u r one to talk rite Allura ‘i smuged my rimmel a Little that u cant even see it i will straight up run to the bathroom and panick over it’

**Spaceprincess:** delet urself

**Keith kogay:** u r so weird

**Keith kogay:** i think i love u all

**Keith kogay:** except lance, he can go straight up to the sun and die

**Bi-utiful:** same w u


	2. the punch™

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith kogay: i know, i will never forget when u gave me a gerard way cardboard for my 14th bday

_**Gay memes;** _

_**Keith kogay >> Bi-utiful, spacedad, smolbuttough, walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, coolspaceuncle (Sunday, 09:21 PM)** _

 

 **Keith Kogay:** i was wondering

 **Keith kogay:** how do u all know shiro???

 **Smolbuttough:** he’s my bro best friend

 **Keith kogay** : matt?

 **Smolbuttough:** yeh

 **Walkingsunshine:** he Works w lance in the coffee shop so i know him from there

 **Keith kogay:** oh,, oH

 **Walkinsunshine:** ¿?

 **Keith kogay:** so it was lancethe coworker  who called shiro “daddy”  in his first day

 **Bi-utiful:** CAN WE LET THAT GO??? IT WAS AN ACCIDENT OKAY  ?????

 **Spaceprincess:** who calls someone daddy on accident lmao

 **Bi-utiful:** kys allura

 **Spaceprincess:** 2 perfect 2 die sweaty

 **Walkingsunshine:** thru

 **Keith kogay:** so u know shiro for like 1 year???

 **Spaceprincess:** ik him for like 3 yrs or so

 **Keith kogay:** i know, i will never forget when u gave me a gerard way cardboard for my 14th bday

 **Spacedad:** that was epic

 **Spacedad:** Keith started to cry cause he was so happy

 **Keith kogay:** liES

 **Bi-utiful:** emo boi ™

 **Keith kogay:** i came here to have a good time and i feel so attacked right now

 **Smolbuttough:** same

 **Spacedad:** hey Keith remember when you cried the whole day cause you thought MCR was gettin back together?

 **Keith kogay:** hey Shiro, remember when you and Allura tried to date cause you thought you liked her but it was just beacuse she is really pretty

 **Keith kogay:** and then you realised you were pansexual

 **Keith kogay:** and tried to date her again

 **Keith kogay:** but she had a girlfriend ‘cause she realised she was gay????

 **Spaceprincess:** the worst date ever tbh

 **Spacedad:** why would you do that to me?

 **Spacedad:** betrayed by my own family

 **Keith kogay:** u’ll get used to it, after years i feel nothin

 **Spaceprincess:** :(

 **Spacedad:** Keith…

 **Smolbuttough:** oh shi-

 **Bi-utiful:** Keith u okay buddy?

 **Walkingsunshine:** do u need a hug?

 **Keith kogay:** lmao im okay,, dw

 **Smolbuttough:** if u say so

****

**_Bi-utiful >> Keith kogay; (Sunday, 09:53 PM)_ **

 

 **Bi-utiful:** Hey Keith, you sure you are okay?

 **Keith kogay:** yep, dw i always joke w that

 **Keith kogay:** i love to see ppls expression when i joke abt that

 **Bi-utiful:** and here i was, thinking u could be soft and hurt,,, u r just an edgy emo boi™

 **Keith kogay:** all the way buddy

**_Gay memes;_ **

**_Bi-utiful >> Spacedad, smolbuttough, walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, Keith kogay, coolspaceuncle (Monday, 02:12 PM)_ **

**Bi-utiful:** when will be the day that Keith would STOP SITTING IN MY PLACE

 **Keith Kogay:** Mmmhhhhhhhhhhh

 **Keith Kogay:** nEVER

 **Bi-utiful:** fite me

 **Keith kogay:** i could break u w just one hand

 **Bi-utiful:** yeah sure,, fite me after class

 **Spacedad:** NO. NO FIGHTS.

 **Smolbuttough:** i bet on Keith

 **Walkingsunshine:** me too

 **Spaceprincess:** me three

 **Bi-utiful:** fucc u all

 **Coolspaceuncle:** i bet on Keith too

 **Bi-utiful:** even coran?? You’re not the cool uncle anymore

 **Keith kogay:** u flatter me guys

 **Spacedad:** i dont bet on anyone beacause there’s not gonna be a fight.

 

**_Gay memes;_ **

**_Walkingsunshine >> spacedad, smolbuttough, spaceprincess, coolspaceuncle, Keith kogay, bi-utiful (Monday, 07:40 PM)_ **

**Walkingsushine:** OMG

 **Walkingsunshine:** WHY DID LANCE CAME HOME W A BLACK EYE?????

 **Keith kogay:** he was bothering me

 **Walkingsunshine:** AND YOU PUNCHED HIM!?

 **Keith kogay:** HE INSISTED!!

 **Spacedad:** KEITH WHAT THE HELL I TOLD YOU GUYS YOU WOULDNT FIGHT!

 **Bi-utiful:** you are dead to me Kogane.

 **Smolbuttough:** shiiittt

 **Keith kogay:** i wish i was actually dead™

 **Coolspaceuncle:** pls no Keith

 **Bi-utiful:** i cant believe u actually punched me, it fuckin hurts

 **Keith kogay:** that was the point Mcgay

 **Spaceprincess** : bois. Dont fight again

 **Spaceprincess:** lets everyone be nice to everyone and be best Friends forever

 **Bi-utiful:** nope, never. I will never be Friends with that psycho

 **Keith kogay:** i wouldnt want to be Friends™ w me neither

 **Keith kogay:** jk, anyways i dont need a shitty friend like u bye

 

**_Smolbuttough >> Keith kogay; (Monday, 08:12 PM)_ **

**Smolbuttough:** are you alright?

 **Keith kogay:** nope.

 **Smolbuttough:** why did you hit lance??

 **Keith kogay:** idk i panicked

 **Keith kogay:** and he was practically screaming at me that he wanted to fite™ me so i punched him

 **Keith kogay:** you know im not very good with people

 **Keith kogay:** specially if they’re screaming at me and telling me they cant stand me

 **Smolbuttough:** yeah i know,,

 **Keih kogay:** i didnt want to punch him

 **Keith kogay:** and im sorry but im pretty sure he doesnt want to hear abt me ever again

 **Smolbuttough:** just try and see

 **Keith kogay:** okay...

 

**_Keith kogay >> Bi-utiful; (Monday, 08:40 PM)_ **

**Keith kogay:** Hey **_(read)_**

 **Keith kogay:** I’m sorry about what I did earlier ** _(read)_**

 **Keith kogay:** I didn’t wan to punch you **_(read)_**

 **Keith Kogay:** I just panicked ‘cause I’m not very good with people and you were screaming at me so yeah **_(read)_**

 **Keith kogay:** I’m sorry. **_(read)_**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to make it longer than the last  
> i also love sad™ keith sorry
> 
> also as you can see, im a piece of trash with nothing to do w their life so they just post shitty chapters of a shitty "fanfiction"


	3. ugh this is difficult

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> keithwithkittyears.jpg

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is shit, but i wanted to write something for this 'cause idk

**_Gay memes;_ **

**_Bi-utiful >> spacedad, smolbuttough, walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, coolspaceuncle, Keith kogay (Thursday, 03:04 PM)_ **

**Bi-utiful:** OMG, I JUST FOUND

 **Bi-utiful:** THE BEST PICTURE OF MY LIFE

 **Spaceprincess:** LANCE NO

 **Spaceprincess:** DONT BETRAY ME LIKE THIS HE WILL KILL ME

 **Bi-utiful:** I DONT CARE HE DESERVES TO BE HUMILLIATED

 **Walkingsunshine:** what picture? Who?

 **Bi-utiful:** KEITH

 **Keith kogay:** me what?

 **Spaceprincess:** im so sorry Keith

 **Smolbuttough:** WHAT PICTURE?! I wanna see

**Bi-utiful:[ keithwithkittyears.jpg](https://68.media.tumblr.com/3abf6ad03d9826571eb2c92e452dd0a4/tumblr_oivvsbFeB91u2ijogo1_540.jpg)**

**Keith kogay:** ALLURA WHAT THE FUCK

 **Spaceprincess:** IM SORRY

 **Keith kogay:** WHEN THE FUCC WAS THAT???

  
**spaceprincess:** is from that day that u stayed at my home ‘cause shiro had to go to see his mom and u fell asleep in the couch

 **Keith kogay:** I swear to god lance that if you show that picture to anyone else I would break your nose

 **Walkingsunshine:** awww Keith, you look so cute!

 **Spacedad:** no more punches please

 **Smolbuttough:** new lockscreen lol

 **Keith kogay:** agH

 **Keith kogay:** brb killing myself

 **Spacedad:** Keith please, it’s just a pic

 **Keith kogay:** AN EMBARRASSING PIC THAT LANCE WILL PROBS USE AGAINST ME, THANK U VERY MUCH

 **bi-utiful:** contrary to your beliefs im not like you so i wont use it

 **Keith kogay:** not like me????

 **Bi-utiful:** yeah, not a piece of shit

 **Smolbuttough:** lance, fucc off

 **Spaceprincess:** actually, that was rude even for lance

 **Walkingsunshine:** i agree w allura

 **Bi-utiful:** idc, he’s that

 **Keith kogay:** whatever u say mcgay

****

**_Keith kogay has left the chat._ **

****

**_Spacedad >> Keith kogay (Thursday, 03:22 PM)_ **

****

**Spacedad:** y’know you are not a piece of shit, right?

 **Keith kogay:** that guy is starting to make me think i am

 **Spacedad:** you’re not

 **Spacedad:** he’s just angry cause you didn’t apologize

 **Keith kogay:** I DID!

 **Keith kogay:** I APOLOGIZED AND HE DIDN’T REPLY

 **Keith kogay:** he ignored me

 **Keith kogay:** ugh, i hate people and you know it.

 **Keith kogay:** i can’t believe you are friends with that guy.

 

**_Walkingsunshine >> bi-utiful (Tuesday, 03:26) _ **

**Walkingsunshine:** bro, i think you should apologize to Keith

 **Walkingsunshine:** you told me he apologized for punching you

 **Walkingsunshine:** and now you call him a piece of shit?:(

 **Walkingsunshine:** thats not cool nor nice

 **Bi-utiful:** sorry Hunk

 **Bi-utiful:** it’s just that he rlly pisses off

 **Bi-utiful:** thinking he’s the best

 **Walkingsunshine:** u realise that he doesnt think he’s the best???

 **Walkingsunshine:** Keith obviously has a thing for briging himself down so i dont think that he thinks he’s better than the rest or something

 **Bi-utiful:** nah, he just fakes that to be cool and edgy

 **Walkingsunshine:** lance… you yourself have panickattacks and i have anxiety

 **Walkingsunshine:** i dont think u should treat Keith like that

 **Bi-utiful:** whatever, dont worry hunk, i’ll apologize later

 **Bi-utiful:** gtg

 

 

 

**_Walkingsunshine >> Keith kogay (Tuesday, 09:21 PM)_ **

**Walkingsunshine** : hey Keith, did lance apologize to u??

 **Keith kogay:** no???

 **Walkingsunshine:** oh…

 **Walkingsunshine:** well, he told me he would do it

 **Keith kogay:** its okay Hunk

 **Keith kogay:** i kinda deserved that after i punched him so yeah

 **Walkingsunshine:** yeah but u apologized

 **Keith kogay:** srsly Hunk, everything is alright.

 **Keith kogay:** i don’t need his pitty sorry’s anyways lol

 **Walkingsunshine:** well,, if u say so

 

**_Gay memes;_ **

**_Smolbuttough >> spacedad, bi-utiful, walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, coolspaceuncle, Keith kogay (Wednesday, 04:30 PM)_ **

**Smolbuttough:** the real question here is

 **Smolbuttough:** when will lance and Keith be in the same room without screaming at each other

 **Spacedad:** sigh, what happened?

 **Walkingsunshine:** we went to the apartament ‘cause we didn’t have our last class

 **Walkingsunshine:** and lance was already there

 **Keith kogay:** so he asked, and I quote “what the fuckin fuck are you doing fuckin here you fuckin asshole”

 **Smolbuttough:** and then thats when they started screaming at each other again

 **Smolbuttough:** like always

 **Bi-utiful:** i just wanted to have a nice day without an asshole in it

 **Keith kogay:** you: nice day  
                    me, an intellectual: death

 **Bi-utiful:** stop memeing u trash

 **Spaceprincess:** they day lance and Keith are friends is the day i would ask on a date to my co-worker Nyma who has a bad reputation and has stealed something from everyone at work except me

 **Smolbuttough:** guys, i need u to be friends now

 **Bi-utiful:** note ven for allura getting robed

 **Spaceprincess:** should i be flattered?

 **Spacedad:** definitely no

 **Keith kogay:** whatever

 **Keith kogay:** i have to go, Hunk and I are going to make cookies

 **Keith kogay:** and only pidge, hunk and i are gonna eat them. Bye

 **Bi-utiful:** kys mullet boi


	4. caffeine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith Kogay: I failed my exam.  
> Bi-utiful: Good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry that this is super short and im sorry i didnt post anything. I had planned to post after New Year, but my new year was shit and then the rest of the week was shit too but its gettin better  
> i just had the best argument w/an stupid dickhead who was my friend 'cause he said things to my gf and i feel so relieved and also i think i have inspiration

**_Gay memes;_ **

****

**_spacedad >> , bi-utiful, walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, coolspaceuncle,Keith kogay , smolbuttough (Monday, 02:30 AM)_ **

**Spacedad:** help

 **Spacedad:** keith drank a shit ton of energy drink and coffee

 **Spacedad:** and now he wont sleep

 **Spacedad:** or stop talking or walking

 **Walkingsunshine:** why did he drink coffee and energy drinks???

 **Keith Kogay:** cause i have an exam and i have to study

 **Keith Kogay:** but i didnt sleep last night so

 **Keith Kogay:** so i drank all of that

 **Keith Kogay:** i never felt so fuckin alive man

 **Spaceprincess:** omg keith stop, is too damn late for this shit

 **Keith** **Kogane:** or is it too early??????  
**  
Bi-utiful:** someone kill him please

 **Keith Kogay:** yOU CAN'T KILL ME

 **Keith Kogay:** IM IMMORTAL

 **Smolbuttough:** he looks more on drugs than in caffeine tbh

**Keith Kogay:** meme.jpg

**Spacedad:** oh no

 **Walkingsunshine:** lol no bye. im going to mute the chat.

 **Walkingsunshine:** gn

**Keith Kogay:** me.jpg

**Keith Kogay:** imded.jpg

**Keith Kogay:** iliveformemes.jpg

**Keith Kogay: lance.jpg**

**Kieth Kogag:** memes2.jpg

**Bi-ultiful:** oMG STOP

 **Bi-utiful:** AND WHY THE FUCK THAT THINGS HAS MY NAME???

 **Keith Kogay:** ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**_Gay memes;_ **

****

**_Keith kogay >> , bi-utiful, walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, coolspaceuncle,spacedad, smolbuttough (Monday, 05:55 PM)_ **

**Keith Kogay:** I failed my exam.

 **Bi-utiful:** Good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keith is me rn, 'cause i just drank a lot of energy drinks and i feel super alive, so i wanted to show it to you guys
> 
> (also i was wondering if u guys would like if i write a chapter but like not group chat lmao i succ at that but i will try)


	5. help shiro cook

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bi-utiful: hE SINGS LIKE AN ANGEL  
> Bi-utiful: NO WAIT I DIDNT MEANT TO SEND THAT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i need to find a way to get inspiration

**_Uhg, school;_ **

 

 

**_bi-utiful >>  walkingsunshine, smolbuttough (Thuesday, 09:20 PM)_ **

 

 ** _Bi-utiful:_** did you guys knew that Keith could play the guitar??!!!

 

 ** _walkingsunshine:_** he can???

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** yeh

 

 ** _bi-utiful:_** hE ALSO SINGS OMG

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** are you freakin out cause he keeps beign better than you in everything

 

 ** _bi-utiful:_** hE SINGS LIKE AN ANGEL

 

 ** _Bi-utiful:_** NO WAIT I DIDNT MEANT TO SEND THAT

 

 ** _walkingsunshine:_** ... Lance

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** do you have

 

 ** _walkingsushine:_** a

 

 ** _bi-utiful:_** NO I DONT I DONT HAVE ANYTHING AT ALL

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** CRUSH

 

 ** _walkingsunshine:_** yOU HAVE A CRUSH ON KEITH

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** man, cant believe this

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** you've know him for like a month and a half and you r already in love

 

 ** _walkingsunshine:_** lance has fallen for his enemy

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** WASTED.

 

 ** _walkingsunshine:_** you'll look cute as a couple dw

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** The Emo and The Narcissist. Epic

 

 ** _bi-utiful:_** oKAY FIRST OF ALL I AM NOT IN LOVE W KEITH

 

 ** _bi-utiful:_** SECOND OF ALL EVEN IF I WAS, WICH IM NOT BTW, HE HATES ME JFC GUYS

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** yeah sure

 

 ** _walkingsunshine:_** i think he likes you too :)

 

 ** _bi-utiful:_** uHG

 

 ** _walkingsunshine:_** but wait, how did you find out that keith plays the guitar and sings like an angel?

 

 ** _bi-utiful:_** im at shiro's w allura and well keith lives here too duh

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** huh

 

**_Gay memes;_ **

 

****

 

**_bi-utiful >>spacedad , walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, coolspaceuncle,Keith kogay , smolbuttough (Thuesday, 09:45 PM)_ **

 

 ** _spaceprincess:_** at my wedding i want keith to play the music

 

 ** _bi-utiful:_** he would probs only play mcr

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** you're right besides me i can punch you y'know?

 

 ** _bi-utiful:_** shiro wont let u

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** shiro is too busy being all lovey dovey w matt he wont notice

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** who would marry allura tho

 

 ** _spaceprincess:_** 'cause im too beautiful for any normal person? Ikr

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** no, beacuse none would stand you whines abt make up and clothes

 

 ** _spaceprincess:_** you and shiro stand me :(

 

 ** _walkingsunshine:_** shiro's too good to say something to u

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** and i stand u cause i need someone to feed me

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** shiro cant cook for shit

 

 ** _spaceprincess:_** lmao true

 

 ** _spacedad:_** oh thank you guys, i love you too.

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** he mad

 

 ** _walkingsunshine:_** i come back from grocery shopping and shiro's mad, what did u do?

 

 ** _bi-utiful:_** keith and allura say that shiro cant cook for shit

 

 ** _walkingsunshine:_** uh... shiro cooks in his own unique way

 

 ** _spacedad:_** good luck finding someone who lets all of u have a ur breakdowns in their house

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** i live w u so i still can lmao

 

 ** _spacedad:_** go live w allura, she gives you good food, right?

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** oooohhhh

 

 

**_Gay memes;_ **

 

****

 

**_spacedad >> , bi-utiful, walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, coolspaceuncle,Keith kogay , smolbuttough (Thuesday, 10:23 PM)_ **

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** GUYS, SHIRO WONT LET ME IN THE APARTAMENT

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** IS FREEZING AND IM IN THE HALLWAY

 

 ** _spacedad:_** you shouldnt have say that i couldnt cook for shit ;)

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** gotta kms bye

 

 ** _walkingsunshine:_** wow i've never seen shiro get this mad

 

 ** _spaceprincess:_** he gets whiny when someone insults his cooking skills

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** shiro doesnt cook that bad, he once made cookies for matt and they were awesome

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** i made them. shiro gave me 30 $ if i cooked them for him

 

 ** _spacedad:_** who could you do this to me?

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** thats what i said when my dad left me

 

 ** _bi-utiful:_** wow this scalated quickly

 

 ** _keith kogay:_** he let me in, hahaha

 

 ** _spacedad:_** im weak when he does that

 

 ** _smolbuttough:_** shiro weakness; Keith being emo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is canon that Pidge calls keith emo and im so happy about it, idk why but i always headcanon it and now is freakin canon, thank u dreamworks, now can you make klance canon? thank you very much see u the 20th
> 
> (ALSO ONLY 5 DAYS JFC I CANT BREATH I ACTUALLY CRIED WHEN I REALISED THAT IN 5 DAYS IM SEEING MY KIDS AGAIN)
> 
> (also 2, do u guys like this shit? cause its pure bullshit and i probs put some things i did/say w my friends lmao but yeah, do you want me to continue or nah?)


	6. keith's a cat confirmed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith kogay: i relate to them on a spiritual level  
> Bi-utiful: the only thing they do is eat, sleep and they hate everybody

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is so short lmao im sorry. didnt have a computer for quite a time and no inspiration either kms  
> also been busy w/ other fandoms. can you believe stony and spideypool are canon? 2007 is good

_**Keith kogay >> , bi-utiful, walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, spacedad, coolspaceuncle, smolbuttough (Friday, 08:20 PM)** _

__

**Keith Kogay:** whats the best name for a cat…?

 **Spacedad:** why

 **Smolbuttough:** Rover

 **Spaceprincess:** Allura~

 **Bi-utiful:** Lance~

 **Keith Kogay:** I hate both of u

 **Keith Kogay:** im calling it “red”

 **Spacedad:** Calling red what

 **Keith kogay:** our cat

 **Spacedad:** we dont have a cat

 **Keith kogay:** now we do

 **Spacedad:** im gonna kill you when i get home

 **Walkingsunshine:** I didnt know you liked cats :o

 **Keith kogay:** i relate to them on a spiritual level

 **Bi-utiful:** the only thing they do is eat, sleep and they hate everybody

 **Keith kogay:** I know, thats why

 **Smolbuttough:** yeah, i can see it

 **Walkingsunshine:** me too tbh

 **Spaceprincess:** you should call them allura, i mean

 **Keith kogay:** Im not calling her allura

 **Spaceprincess:** why :(

 **Bi-utiful:** beacause he’s calling her lance, duh

 **Keith kogay:** im not calling her lance either.

 **Keith kogay:** her name is Red

 **Smolbuttough:** why

 **Spacedad:** beacuse she’s ginger…

 **Spacedad:** and she scratchs really fuckin hard jfc

 **Walkingsunshine:** is Keith dead yet?

 **Bi-utiful:** #prayforkeith

 **Smolbuttough** : #prayforkeith

 **Spaceprincess:** #prayforkeith

 **Keith kogay:** im alive!

 **Keith kogay:** he just scolded me cause now we have to buy cat food and stuff

 **Walkingsunshine:** yay, you’re keeping her!

 **Spacedad:** of course

 **Spacedad:** none wants a cat this days and im not a bad person so i wont throw her to the streets

 **Bi-utiful:** how did you find her anyway?

 **Keith kogay:** i was walking back from my classes and she was there meowing and i pet her

 **Smolbuttough:** thats all?

 **Keith kogay:** yeh after that she followed me home and i couldnt leave her outside

 **Walkingsunshine:** Keith is a softie awww

 **Spaceprincess:** he is <3

 **Keith kogay:** uhg

 **Bi-utiful:** I insist you should name her Lance

 **Keith kogay:** No.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you're wondering, cats do follow you if you only pet them or something, thats how i got all my cats(3cats) tbh. im a lover of cats so i made keith a lover of cats, fight me
> 
> Also, thank u sm for reading this shit! <3 i aprecciate all the coments and kudos. it means a lot to me <3 (btw i know who are the ppl who always coment, thank u to all of u for stiking w/ this crap<3)


	7. save them

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith kogay: save us pls

_**Gay memes;** _

_**smolbuttough >> spacedad bi-utiful, walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, coolspaceuncle ** _ **_(Sunday, 07:24 PM)_ **

**smolbuttough:** where’s lance?

 **Smolbuttough:** we were going to buy some things today

 **Walkingsunshine:** dunno

 **Spacedad:** lances quite bussy rn

 **Smolbuttough:**   ?

 **Bi-utiful:** help

 **Bi-utiful:** shiro trapped us

 **Walkingsunshine:** us?

 **Keith kogay:** lance and me

 **Spacedad:** get out of your phones and go back to

 **Spacedad:** something that isnt fighting

 **Keith kogay:** but

 **Bi-utiful:** we dont wanna be here

 **Keith kogay:** save us pls

 **Spacedad:** Nope

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi my name is alec and i dont have a clue of how to write a good fic so i only write chat-fics and cry myself to sleep, save this boi pls
> 
> also i have exams in a couple of days, can someone hit me w their car or smth? i rlly want to die, goodbye thanks for reading


	8. Where do you hide your knives?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [Shiro (04:40 PM);  
> you aren’t getting out of there until you two get along.]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you hear that? Yaasss, that's my inspiration gettin' the fuck out of my head amirite  
> im sorry this is so bad. I hate it and I'll probs would re-write it

Keith sighed and lookd down at his phone again, reading for the 10th time Shiro’s message.

**_[Shiro  (04:40 PM);_ **

**_you aren’t getting out of there until you two get along.]_ **

“What the hell was shiro thinking when he put us here?”  Lance said

“Don’t know. Seriously he’s expecting the imposible. We’re never gonna get along” Keith sat in the bed next to Lance while this looked at the room

“I thought your room was going to be super edgy with My Chemical Romance posters everywhere” Keith rolled his eyes “What? Everyone expected that”

“No they didn’t.”

They stayed in silence, thinking what to do, what to talk about. None of them really talked like normal people, they were usually competing or something.

Keith didn’t really dislike Lance, he hadn’t have time to think about him really. But he seemed like a nice guy, until he opened his mouth-

“why are you so rude anyways?” Lance asked, looking genuinely curious

“I- I’m not rude…”  the other boy raised his eyebrow putting a hand on Keith’s shoulder

“Keith, you’re rude. I know it’s hard to accept but with time you wou-“

Keith smacked Lance’s hand and snorted  “Idiot” Lance smiled and shrugged

“Where do you hide your knives?”

“Aahhg”

 

-

 

_**Gay memes;** _

_**Bi-utiful >> spacedad, smolbuttough, walkingsunshine, spaceprincess, coolspaceuncle (Sunday, 08:30 PM)** _

 

**Bi-utiful:** can you believe that Keith can make jokes that aren’t death-related???

**Bi-utiful:** and they’re funny

**Keith kogay:** wow thanks i guess

**Smolbuttough:** omg whats this

**Walkingsunshine:** are we in another univers or something? Cause lance just said something nice about Keith

**Spacedad:** wow, it worked

**Spaceprincess:** what, what worked what happened

**Keith kogay:** does this mean that

**Keith kogay _:  [ **Spaceprincess:**  _** _they day lance and Keith are friends is the day i would ask on a date to my co-worker Nyma who has a bad reputation and has stealed something from everyone at work except me **]**_

**Spaceprincess:** wait no

**Spaceprincess** : i wasnt serious about that c’mon

**Spacedad:** sorry allura, you have to do it now

**Smolbuttough:** ohhh

**Walkingsunshine:** good luck :’)

**Bi-utiful:** pretty sure this i what she said

**Bi-utiful: _[ **Spaceprincess:**  _** _they day lance and Keith are friends is the day i would ask Lance on a date **]**_

**Keith kogay:** she didnt said that

**Spaceprincess:** i didnt said that

**Spaceprincess:** okay if Nyma steals something from me, youre all gonna pay me

**Spaceprincess:** bye

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FUN FACT ABOUT THIS CHAPTER: I was listening to the Lemonade Mouth soundtrack 
> 
> im so sorry y'all had to read this piece of shit  
> but thank you for doing it  
> also this chapter is cursed, i almost broke my nail a couple of times writing it, rip
> 
> i will continue this and write what happened as soon as i know what the hell happened
> 
> also self promo; follow me on twitter @maoloveslance or instagram cosmicodda bye


	9. It wasn't so bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What the hell happened

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally! It's been Long™  
> This is super self-insert cause im currently in the hamilton hell
> 
> Also sorry for any typos. I wrote this on my phone

"Where do you hide your knives?"

 

"Ahhg" he laid down in the bed, lookin' a the ceiling thinking what the hell he did to deserve to be in the same room as Lance

 

Lance looked around, still taking in the room. The walls were a soft beige and it did have posters, but not mcr -okay maybe it did, but just one, Lance noticed- some were from movies or series--

 

"Is that a Hamilton poster?" Keith turned his head to the side so he could see Lance, and then he sat up looking at the poster the other boy was pointing at

 

"Yes. I went to see it with Shiro last year" he wasn't a big fan of musicals -well he was a big fan of musicals, but none had to know, except for shiro and allura... And maybe their neighbors, but whatever. "It was really good"

 

"No way! I wanted to see it! But with the original cast" he stood up and looked closely at the poster

 

"Yeah. The original is the best one"

 

"Uh-huh" Lance kept looking around the room

 

"Y'know," he said standing up "you're not going to find my knives"

 

"So you do have knives!"

 

Keith rolled his eyes "No. I don't. It was a joke"

 

Lance seemed to process that and the sighed- like, dramatically sighed "my dear Keith, I know they are somewhere"

 

"Whatever" 

 

It continued like that, Lance claiming that he would find Keith's knives (why would i put knives in my cloth- stop! Thats my underwea- Lance oh my god, stop).

 

It wasn't as bad as Keith thought it would be.


	10. Important (i guess)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Im a big trash

Okay so, this is not a chapter (duh) it's just to say that i'm planin' on deleting this or something, maybe put it on an orphan acc? Idk. 

I just feel really ehm, ashamed? Of this and I want it gone™ 

I don't think anyone would mind tbh. there's like at least 20-30? fics better than this one so yeah.

 

Thank you for all the kudos and comments tho! 

 

Bye-bye


End file.
